The Cost of What You Want
Everything has a cost.
Sometimes the cost comes in the form of time, energy, mental capacity, money, or reputation. But there's always a cost.
Improving your marriage has a cost.
Becoming a runner has a cost.
Starting a meditation habit has a cost.
Your kid joining the youth soccer league has a cost.
Getting on a budget has a cost.
Often, we're very aware of the cost of things we don't want. We know what (or at least that) it will cost us to address the leaking water heater in the garage. We are aware there's a cost to staying with the in-laws for a week during the holidays.
When it comes to what we want, we are more likely to play dumb to the cost. It feels like ignorance helps us take the first step. And that may be true - but it doesn't help us take the second, third and fourth.
When we don't count the cost up front, the likelihood we will follow through drops. We're going in with our eyes half closed and our fingers crossed. Not counting the cost up front means it will hit us in the face when we're in the weeds, when we're struggling and more vulnerable to quit. "You know, this just won't work for me because..."
The one who doesn't count the cost up front ends up paying double. They pay the required cost and then, if they quit when things get hard, they end up losing trust in themselves too. Everything has a cost, especially if you don't account for it.
The one who evaluates the cost up front can accept it with gladness. When they get into the weeds, they are prepared for it. They made peace with the challenges and trade-offs ahead of time.
A litmus test for how well you accept the cost of your commitments up front: how often do you 1) back out of things you've committed to? Or 2) complain?
There can actually be satisfaction in paying a high cost for something when we really want it. Whether it's a really cool pair of Helm Boots or training for a half marathon, a high cost can be a selling point. The sacrifice is part of what makes it valuable. But there is only joy when we acknowledge the cost up front, embracing both the reward and the sacrifice that we are embarking on.
Living a meaningful life means pursuing what we value. And everything we value has a cost. Assess the cost of the things you want. Be completely sober minded when deciding to commit to something. The bigger the commitment, the more it helps to be ridiculously specific about even the smallest sacrifices that this decision will require. If I say yes to this project it will mean I spend 40 more minutes in the car everyday, I will have to talk to Jason regularly for the next 6 weeks, I will miss two of my son's soccer games, I will have to say no to other projects that may come along...
If you decide it's worth the cost, then pay it! With joy! Even the hard parts, because they're part of the package. There’s a quote attributed to Jesus that says, “Which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it?” There’s a peace that comes from embracing your limits and knowing what you are saying yes to.
How would this week be different if you slowed down to count the cost of your decisions?
Everything has a cost. Blessed is the one who knows the cost of what they are committing to - for theirs is the peace and joy of living from true commitment.
